NEW EYES, NEW WORDS

For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account. (Hebrews 4:12-13 ESV)

I'm never fully satisfied with the outcomes of my eye exams because of the parts where the doctor asks me to read the letters and numbers from the chart on the wall. Regardless of whether they ask me to cover one eye at a time or try out different combinations of lenses to find the true quality of my eyesight, the characters remain the same.

So when they ask me to read a line on that chart with one combination of lenses formed in that Phoroptor (the contraption they place against my face), then ask me to read the same lifeless line again with another combination of lenses, it's tempting to recite the string of letters and numbers from memory rather than by what I actually see. The doctor's words of affirmation each time don't help.

How can I be satisfied with such a crude test for something as important as my eyesight?

This is why I'm glad God's Word is alive -- always the same yet always different.

I am still amazed at how much I learn from reading the same passages of the Bible over and over and over again. The words remain the same, yet their meaning and significance are always different -- clearer, sharper, deeper.

Among the many things the Word of God is to me, it's a litmus test. Each time I read its pages, I discover the quality of my mind, heart and soul. I often don't like its results, but I'm glad for them.

Those words are lenses through which I learn how well I see God, myself, others around me, this world, my life -- everything.

Though I sometimes begrudge reading "the same" words over and over and over again, childishly believing that there is no more to glean from them, I am never left the same after reading them.

New joys are found.
New sins are in need of repentance.
New convictions wound me.
New comforts heal me.
New chains are found.
New keys unlock new freedoms.
New tears are shed.
New eyes are grown.

When our color dies,
We will bury the ashes of time,
And we will earn new eyes.

A LIVE BODY

"A live body is not one that never gets hurt, but one that can to some extent repair itself. In the same way a Christian is not a man who never goes wrong, hut a man who is enabled to repent and pick himself up and begin over again after each stumble -- because the Christ-life is inside him, repairing him all the time, enabling him to repeat (in some degree) the kind of voluntary death which Christ Himself carried out." - C.S. Lewis

MEN'S BATHROOM CONSPIRACY

Here's something I wrote back in late 2004, unedited:

Something funny happened in the men's bathroom today.

So I walked in to take a #2, and all four stalls were empty, so I decided to occupy the first stall. But I guess the first one is the most popular cos the toilet paper was out. I'm glad I noticed before I sat down and unloaded, or else I would've been in a little predicament. I moved down to the third stall (the fourth one is for handicapped people, and no one likes sitting in the second one...cos if the first and third get occupied, you're taking a dump in between two other mysterious people, and that is just not comfortable at all) and proceeded to feed the toilet.

About two minutes later, I hear someone walk in and go into the first stall. I listened carefully to hear whether or not he would realize that there was no more toilet paper and move to another stall (which I hoped he would not do, because he probably would have moved next to me in the second stall, which would not have made for much comfort at all). But he didn't. I heard him unzip, sit down, and then proceed to splish splash away to his intestinal delight.

Needless to say, I almost burst into laughter. But I held it in.

After I washed my hands and was walking out, I almost laughed again, but held it in. I could just picture the guy realizing his predicament about halfway through his situation, and then think to himself, "Oh crap." Hahaha, I'm giggling now just thinking about it. And I pictured him waiting until I had left so he could waddle over to another stall, hoping that no one would walk in on him. Hahaha. And I also thought about taking all the other toilet paper in the bathroom, but never really considered doing it. I mean, that's just plain wrong...but it would have been ridiculously funny.

That was quite possibly the highlight of my workday. It was splendid.

Speaking of the men's bathroom...

I always wondered why they were made to be so uncomfortable. I mean, why can't they make stalls that didn't have those gaps in between the doors and separators? Why couldn't they create a simple red/green signal (something like they do on airplanes) on the stall doors so people wouldn't have to peek into the actual stall to see if it is occupied or not? Why don't the bottoms of the stalls reach the ground, leaving those awkward spaces so that you can see the man next to you tapping his foot as he's unleashing his intestinal wrath? Why are the urinals made in such a way as to allow any weirdo peeing next to you to just peek over and see your most private of privates? WHY?

I think I know why.

If public bathrooms (especially in offices) were made to be comfortable, what would stop anyone from wasting time in there? I mean, sometimes I'll "rest my eyes" after taking a dump because I feel secure and peaceful sitting in the stall, but when other people enter the bathroom I just can't stand the fact that I'm prone to being looked at between those dastardly gaps and so I more times than not leave as quickly as possible. If the bathroom were built to be comfortable and according to how I would want it (with no gaps, a red/green vacancy signal on each stall door, floor to ceiling coverage, disposable noseplugs in each stall, headphones with classical music in each stall with your selection of newspaper, and booths around the urinals), I'm sure my productivity would plummet. (Wait, no, that's impossible, because right now my productivity is close to zero already. This is besides the point.)

My point is, the man who designed what we now know as public bathrooms for men was an astute fellow, who had a method to his madness. Though I do not appreciate it, I respect him for being so ingenious.

And I also believe this is why men are more productive in the workplace than women, because women's bathrooms always have those plush couches and loveseats. I mean, c'mon, seriously, you're telling me they don't waste valuable company time gossiping and doing their makeup while sitting prim and pretty on those lovely seats? (I'm totally kidding.)

Alas, and here we have yet another picture (albeit flawed, lacking, and very crude) of something that we know from life's experiences; something C.S. Lewis talked about, and something Paul talked about.

Resting places on this earth are not meant to be places where we settle for good. They are meant for some purpose, just as a bathroom is meant for the release of your bodily waste. And once they have fulfilled their purposes, it is time to move on, to go forth and carry on the work that lies outside.

You can't sit in the steamy warmth and restful peace of the morning shower all day. There is life to be lived just outside the bathroom door.

You can't sit on the toilet seat all day. There is work to be done just outside the door.

You can't just lie down forever in the riches of a restful time that has been graciously bestowed unto you. There is a vast field that has yet to be harvested just outside the door.

"The settled happiness and security which we all desire, God withholds from us by the very nature of the world: but joy, pleasure, and merriment, He has scattered broadcast. We are never safe, but we have plenty of fun, and some ecstasy. It is not hard to see why. The security we crave would teach us to rest our hearts in this world and oppose an obstacle to our return to God: a few moments of happy love, a landscape, a symphony, a merry meeting with our friends, a bathe or a football match, have no such tendency. Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home." - C.S. Lewis

"Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before." - Philippians 3:13

A CURSE AND A BLESSING

Here's something I wrote back in early 2004, unedited:

I have finally finished reading the entire Bible!!!

Of course, it comes a bit late... I vowed to finish it this past summer, haha.  Better late than never, right?  I've read the NT over a few times, but I finally finished the entire OT just a few minutes ago.  But, yeah...it feels good to know that I've finished the Bible.  I consider it a great blessing to have been given the opportunity for my eyes to behold every word of God in the Bible...though I definitely cannot claim to have retained or even learned from the majority of it.  But, the more and more I read it...the more and more I understand just how many "layers" there are, just how much there is to discover.  It seems like every time I read a passage over again, I see something new.  It's awesome... I can't wait to see what new things I learn as I read it all over again.

One thing that caught my attention was how the Old Testament ends.  "He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse." (Malachi 4:6)  Now...maybe it's just me, but I thought that that was a horribly pessimistic and condeming way to end the OT.  I mean, of course, God didn't intend the OT to be just a "good story" to read with a fairy tale ending...but I mean, c'mon...how you gonna end it with a curse?! So, in my curiosity, I looked up this verse in a commentary online (by Matthew Henry), and it pointed something out that I found to be quite enlightening.

Yes, the Old Testament ends with a curse, but it does so that we may joyfully welcome the New Testament's arrival, which marks Christ's arrival, for He comes not with a curse, but with a great blessing.  And isn't it wonderful, that though the OT ends with a curse, the NT ends with a beautiful blessing: "The grace of our Lord Jesus be with God's people. Amen." (Rev. 22:21)  And, as Matthew Henry puts it, "with it let us arm ourselves, or rather let God arm us, against this curse."

Hallelujah, Amen.

"But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall." - Malachi 4:2

THE PLAY

Here's something I wrote back in late 2003, unedited:

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise" - 1 Co. 1:27

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see...And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." - Hebrews 11:1, 6

  We live in a fallen world.  I see it everyday...dying plants, rust growing on metal beams, fading paint on the streets, roadkill, faded street signs, potholes, car accidents, traffic jams, ads using sex appeal, second-hand smoke, countless scandals in the business world, that homeless girl with her dog on the corner, those gimpy pigeons in the Port Authority with missing toes, that handicapped guy who rides the same bus I do each morning, those days when my boxers never seem to be on right, lust, pride, hate, murder, suicide...the list goes on...

  In view of all that, it's expected that faith is difficult to have, and even harder to keep.  It's so hard to see the point in it all.  The immediate rewards of faith, if any, seem so few...

  But this morning, I believe God spoke to me through Brendan Fraser.  Yes, the guy in The Mummy movies.  He was being interviewed by Al Roker on the Today Show about the new Looney Toons movie he's appearing in.  They talked about how in this movie, and in a lot of his other movies, he's had to deal with acting with imaginary characters.  He had to pretend that they were there while filming, and then in the production room, they add them in by using computers, and you can see the finished product in the final cut of the movie, and it all turns out "well."  He said, "You just have to believe that they're there."

  He had faith in those imaginary characters...he had faith that they would appear in the actual movie, and that all those seemingly foolish hours acting by himself would be rewarded when those characters are finally seen on the screen.  If Brendan Fraser could have faith in that, how much more are we to have faith in our lives?

  Of course, in this present life, here on this fallen earth, our acts of faith and the way our faith seems to mold who we are seem utterly foolish to the world.  Why waste your time at church? Why stay away from getting drunk and smoking? Why should you stop cursing? Why do you pray before you eat? Why embarass yourself in front of everyone?  All the small things that our faith manifests itself in are mere pretending, child's play, to the eyes of the world.  To them, and maybe sometimes to ourselves, it seems as if we are living in a way that is so foolish all because of our faith...it seems as if we are acting out scenes all by ourselves, with a phantom, false hope of anything good resulting from it.  It's so hard for us to see and understand that the Director will take care of it all.

  This movie (or as Mr. Lewis likes to call it, this "play") we are acting in will eventually be made beautiful.  It seems as if we are acting it out by ourselves for now, but we can surely trust that our Co-Star (or, in reality, the Star) who is not tangibly here now, will show Himself in the end.  All those times you gave up your seat for an elderly person, all those times you gave that homeless girl a dollar, all those times you refrained from yelling at your mom, all those times you spent that hour to talk with a friend in need when you could have been studying for that big exam tomorrow...in the end, they will be made complete, fulfilled, and it will no longer be foolishness.

  So let us act with confidence here on earth, knowing full well that our present "foolishness" will be seen as unspeakable beauty and divine wisdom when this movie is finally finished for all the world to see, when the true Star will finally be revealed in full, undeniable glory.  Oh, what an ending this movie will have...

  Ah, the echoes of redemption...of the Gospel...of God...everywhere around us. :)

A CALL TO ARMS

Here's something I wrote back in late 2004, unedited:

“Doubt is a luxury we can’t afford right now, sweetie.”

– Elastigirl (Helen Parr) to her daughter Violet in The Incredibles

            Allow me the chance to propose to you my theory of “Accelerated Backwardness.”  I’m sure that despite the awkward name, this theory is very familiar to all of you.  It seems to me that almost everything on this earth takes much less time to undo or do in reverse than it does to make it in the first place.  Here are a few examples:

• Climbing a hill or mountain takes longer than it does coming down.  Now, of course, gravity may have a part in this, but regardless, it supports this point.
• Oftentimes it takes much longer to find a place than it does to find your way home from it.
• It takes nine months to create life, and less than nine-tenths of a second to destroy it.
• An author can take a lifetime creating his work, and it can take an everyday reader a month to read through it all.
• A large tree may have taken lifetimes to grow to its current size, but all it takes is a few pieces of heavy equipment and a few minutes to cut it down.
• A bottle of fine wine may ferment for years on end, but all it takes is a few minutes for a drinker or two for it to be gone.
• It can take you a substantial amount of hours (and for those more diligent, days) to cram/study for a huge and important exam that only lasts for an hour or two.
• A Thanksgiving feast may take endless hours, maybe even days to produce, but all it takes is an hour for a family to devour it all.

You all know what I’m talking about now, don’t you?  It’s one of those overlooked facts of life on earth, and we are all familiar with it.

But this is not a scribble about some true but seemingly insignificant fact of life.  This is about our individual lives in Christ.  We are all at war with an enemy that is far too adept and shrewd to be taken lightly, yet many if not all of us appear to be soldiers fighting against a puppy.  This is not meant to be.  Dare I say it, but I see in all of us, myself most of all, a lack of urgency that could lead to our accelerated backward downfall.

“A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest – and poverty will come on your like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man.” (Proverbs 6:10-11)  Many of us take this as some biblical financial advice, an adage to live by.  We take it to mean that we must be diligent or else we may be in danger of becoming poor.  But I don’t think that the Creator of all things, our God and Father would place this in His very own Word just to make sure that we don’t fall into fiscal distress.

Dear brothers, this is a warning not to be taken in light of our bank accounts, but in light of this war that we are all in.  Poverty and Scarcity are names for our enemy, who will surely bring about both of these in our spiritual lives if we are not careful.

Take some time with me now to reflect.  Think about all of your commitments, promises, and vows that you have made to yourself or to God, or to anyone else.

Go ahead.  Do it.

Now, I’m sure that most of these promises were inherently good.  They were oaths to better ourselves or a situation in some way, by forsaking a bad habit, focusing on a part of our character that has been lacking, or taking action against a harmful situation.  And if you are anything like me, as you think about these countless pledges, you come to realize that the vast majority of them were made in vain and with dishonest, unwise, and impulsive lips and hearts.

Now take some time with me to imagine.  What if we all followed through on each and every one of those commitments we made?  I don’t know about you, but I envision a church filled with more of Christ’s love and emptied of much bitterness and immaturity.  I also envision myself as a more complete, whole, peaceful, joyful, and loving man of God.  Now, let’s imagine that all Christians around the entire globe followed through on their commitments?  I can’t fully comprehend that, but I can’t help but to picture something that is all too near to heaven.

The point is this: With each and every moment we remain idle, lying in the mire of our own sin and disappointment, our enemy is closer to reaching his dastardly goal, which is to undermine and ruin the relationship with our Father that has been thus far been so beautifully and wonderfully wrought.  Though it may have taken years upon years for God to soften your heart and mind, allowing you to reach the maturity you have been granted today, do not doubt for a second that all it takes is a few days, hours, or moments of doubt, self-pity, and unfaithfulness for it all to be torn down to rubble.

As Elastigirl so wisely puts it, doubt is definitely not a luxury we can afford right now.  Do not lie ignorantly secure in thinking that your past has already secured your future.  A life as God’s child is not free from the duties and responsibilities of a soldier at war.  It is our calling to take each and every moment on the attack against our enemy, to take back bridges that have been taken from us and to claim them in our King’s name once again.

Let’s stop uttering empty promises and let’s stop imagining.  It is time to start to create realities with the commitments of our mouths and hearts, while never doubting, even for a second, that He will be faithful in all He does in our lives.  For too long we have waded in the riches of our ignorance, spending lavishly on doubts of all kinds, but it is time that we take up our weapons and go on the offensive.  It is time to take back that all-important bridge that joins our desires and our actions.

Glory, not blame

As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. And his disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him." (John 9:1-3 ESV)

There was a loud, inconsiderate, irreverent young man seated two rows ahead of me on the train home yesterday. He was loudly talking and cackling with a friend on his cellphone for the first 15 minutes of the ride, as if he were blind to everyone around him. Then the elderly man seated in front of the young man turned around and kindly asked him to be quieter. The young man on the phone verbally brushed the elderly man off and told his friend what had just happened. He then proceeded to repeatedly call the man in front of him "crazy."

This went on for a few more minutes before the middle-aged man seated behind him firmly asked the young man to be quiet, that the train was usually kept quiet out of respect for others and that he was trying to take a nap because he was "tired as hell."

The young man scoffed quietly but continued his conversation in a hushed voice.

During this whole ordeal I couldn't help but to shake my head in disappointment.

"Whose fault is this? Who failed him? His parents must've done a poor job teaching him what it means to be courteous and respectful of those around you. Maybe his teachers didn't do a sufficient job of disciplining him. Maybe his friends abet this behavior."

These were the kind of thoughts treading through my mind.

After reading the three verses posted atop this post, I realized just how quick I am to vindictively assess blame, and how slow I am to see opportunities for glory, mercy and grace. It's so easy to ask why darkness is happening -- more specifically, why it's happening to me -- but so difficult to look beyond that to wonder about what that darkness is meant to bring about.

Is it such a mind-blowing thing to consider that God allows for "blindness" -- hardships, troubles and heartbreak -- in order that he might display his power in it?

No, for we know that our good Father took the darkest blindness and worked out a way to salvation for us. So we can truly say, with full assurance, that it was not we who sinned, nor our parents, nor Adam himself, but rather Jesus, who became sin for us.

I hope the works of God are displayed in that rude young man, as they were in me.